Me and Moore

Percakapan dengan teman berfilosofi, tgl 11 April 2009, dimulai jam 22.30 s/d 00.o6 WIB

Moore (M): Bu, bsk jln yuk! brg kiki. ke pim. biasa. bisa ga?

Gw (G) : Hwala, sori Moore, gbsa. Gw lgy bny tugas ni. tgl 20 ldks soalnya. maav yaaaa... tgl 25 aja d. mau g?

M: Tgl 25 tuh hari apaa? cie yg sibuk! sklh gw jga baru mau ngadain ldks, tp gw ga ikut, males ;p

G: Nyehehe, gw mlh bete tau g. sibuk bgt! ldks d skul gw cuma bwt ank" yg mo ikt osis, n gw kan diharapkan ikut sm bonyok, yo wis gw ikut. tgl 25 hri sabtu ko. mau g?

M:Jah klo gw mlh lg bete gara" ga ada motivasi buat sklh. I just keep on failing :) yah, di sklh gw jga gt. krn gw gamau ya gw ga ikut. bonyok gw juga udh tau gw males. mau, ajak syp lg nanti?

G : Failing on what, sis? gw jg ni, tgs gw mlh kebanyakan smpe gw rasanya pngen sakit aja biar g msk sklh skalian. Ehh yg ada gw mlh tmbh sehat. bete.

M : On everything. I neglected my responsibilities and my relationships. school just getting worse. bwahahahahaha jgn gt dong. kmrn" gw abis sakit"an dan gara" itu suslan gw jd segudang.

G : Hmmm... in what case? gw klo sis g bklan punya waktu bwt take time, relax, breathe deep for just a goddamn second. mana tiap 3bln sekali dites lg.

M : What case apanya? sklh? buset. trus lo ikut cuman gara" ortu lo ngarepin lo jd osis, gt?

G : Mm-hmm. bkp dlu osis, n mrka bharap bny k gw gr" gw g msk labsky. jd, buat penebusan, gto.neglected artinya apa c? beh, gw jd lupa.

M : Tp lo emg pengen jd osis jga? dlu lo ikut tes labsky jga? sama ky ignore. lupa apa 'lupa'? lmao.

G : ... sepertinya 'lupa'. hohohoho. well, gw jg g ngerti c, tp gw tuh udh jd mental boneka aja. apa yg mereka pengen, gw lakuin tanpa mikirin keinginan gw sendiri. mrk pngen gw msk labsky, gw ikt tes msknya. mrk pengen gw dpt nilai bgs, gw b'usaha skrs mungkin. like that.

M : Bwahahahaha. hmm... that sounds really bad. this life is YOURS, not theirs. besides, you have free will. and life is always a choice. jd, klo lo emg gamau, ngapain juga diturutin? gw mah amit" ngikutin keinginan org, bahkan ortu gw. mereka jg udh capek coba ngontrol gw. ini aja gw coba ngalah 1x aja, ngikutin keinginan nyokap, msk labs, udh sengsara stengah mati. kok lo tahan sih?!

G : Hmm, a puppet would never betray her master, wouldn't she? yah, gw c mikirnya, gw itu output terparah di keluarga gw, jd gw nyoba jadi something yg bisa bkin mrk bangga punya gw sbg anak mrk. gt...

M : No, there's no such thing as a 'puppet' or a 'puppet master'. it's a matter of choice. YOU'RE the one who choose to be a puppet. loh, knp lo bisa sampe mikir gt?! gw juga plg rebel ah di keluarga gw, tapi gw ga ngerasa gt. pdhl mereka sering nyaci maki gw. I don't care. yg plg baik itu justru yg ga menonjol.

G : Haha. keren lo. tp mslhnya, gw kyk tau dr pandangan org" klo gw g worth it, n gw gamau bikin keluarga gw sedih. I want the best for them, that's all...

M : Thx. sorry, but I think that's Stupid with a capital S. you should make yourself happy first (but not in the selfish context), after that you could make everyone happy. remember, this is YOUR life. you drive. they're just passengers. annoying, demanding passengers.

G : Heheh, yea. gw enjoy kok sama hidup gw. I got a boyfriend, i can go to malls with my friends almost every saturday, and i gave them good marks n stuffs like that. good deal, eh?

M : I don't think so. you can say that you're 'pretty happy', but when you you look deep upon yourself, you know you don't well, I know that you won't admit that to me! lol. lastly, please, take control of your life, for God's sake.

G : Haha, i will, sista. thx. lo tuh tmn curhat yg bae bgt, d. ngingetin gw sama alice cullen, entah knp.

M : Yah... mungkin ga bisa lsg 'mama, aku capek nurutin mama!' (sinetron abis) tp pelan" lah. sebenernya sih itu jga terserah lo aja, mau 'bebas' atau mau tetep jd korban prasaan" yg ga bener + jadi 'puppet'. masa sih? you're very welcome :D bwahahahahahaha alice

G : WAW, SINETRON ABIS. ntar tinggal ada adengan, nampar, nangis lebay, n shoot deket-jauh-deket-jauh. mantaps. mehehe. serius, ntah knp lo punya vibe kyk alice. jenis yg warm tp di luarnya y gto, rada". nyahaha

M : Jgn lupa sekuel, episode" tiada akhir, dan sountrack cengeng dari band indonesia kacangan yg sesuai. hahahahaha. bisa nyaingin cinta fitri lu! rada" apaan, rada" sableng? lmao. thankiiies :) klo lo ky bella deh...

G : Me? bells? wew. dari segi? gw g se...lebay itu ya sama Bear. gw bisa mati ketawa klo dy nyoba jd edward cullen slm seminggu.

M : Dari segi pengen nyenengin smua org-nya itu. ga seintim itu, ya? huahahahahahah. gw bkn mati ketawa lagi, gw bklan mati ketawa smbil boker di celana. ngebayanginnya aja gw udh semaput.

G : Kan? ya kan? sumpah itu bklan bikin gw mual abis. I mean, klo ganteng mari kita sebut itu romantis, klo jelek mari sama" hujat dgn kata NORAK! mwahahahahahahaha

M : Iya bgt! jd lo menghina pcr lo sendiri, gt? yah mksd gw sih dia ga sealay itu, cuman.... ga pantes aja, lol. eh tega lu, klo ada cwo jelek dnger, lsg gantung diri!

G : Bahaha, ngaku aja, pasti reaksi lo bklan kyk gto klo lo liat sndri. hm, gw mlh rada ngerasa kyk edward deh. bagian permainan emosinya itu lho.

M : Iya sih ;p dan bkn cuman treak norak doang, bkl gw gebukin tuh cwo ampe kapok. hmm...di bagian overprotectivenya? lo sama ky tmen gw deh. gw mlh ngerasa ky diri gw sndiri. be yourself, bcoz everyone else is taken! lmao

G : Nyahaha, iya bgt. well, ada org yg ngomong gw ini terlalu bae, n ada yg bilang gw retarded, tp gada yg ngomong gw complicated. knp ya?

M : Knp lo mau diblg complicated? gw udh sring bgt diblg gt. bhkn gw ska ga ngerti diri gw sndri. and well, nobody understands me.

G : Gada yg ngerti diri mereka sendiri, dan biarlah begitu. terlalu banyak mengerti itu bukan berkah, itu kutukan. a shallow people will enjoy life better than genius people do.

M : Tp gw jauuuh lbh ga ngerti lg dibandingin org" lain. haha. so you said that I'm shallow? I enjoyed life! (while looking for its meaning)

G: Bkn lo, gw. asalkan semuanya baik" aja, gw bklan bahagia. take it like this : kalopun cwo gw selingkuh, asalkan gw g peduli, gw bklan bahagia" aja. yg penting gw seneng, gto. klo untuk hal" yg lbh complex c mungkin g gto jg, tp kurang-lbh gto. stupid, i know.

M : You're not that shallow! hmm... happy as in really happy or happy as in you surpressed your pain and sorrow?

G : The second, kayaknya. asalkan gw punya sesuatu yg bisa gw perjuangkan, walaupun itu sedangkal 'mau mkn es krim' ato 'mau ketemu Faye' tp gw tetep berusaha bangkit n ngeraih keinginan itu. klo udh terpenuhi, gw nyari keinginan lain.kyk main jembatan monyet aja.

M : Ck. another lesson you must learn : face your pain, your 'inner demons'. accept your pain. delve into the darkest parts of your heart. hehehe, ga kali, itu bgs! gw jga gt lol. tos!

G : Tos! yap, kadang gw mikirin soal ketakutan" gw. tp entah knp, klo gw bharap soal sesuatu, pasti akhir"annya itu g bklan kejadian. kyk bella si penarik sial, gw si penghancur mimpi. hehe

M : Akhir" ini gw nyadar klo gw tkt sama 2 hal : fear of failing and fear of imperfections. gw tkt sama hal" itu bkn krn people's expectations, tp lbh ke diri gw sndri, krn gw perfectionist. nah, itu krn cara pikir lo slh. negative thoughts pulled on negative results, so think and feel positive! lame, I know, but true.

G : Hehehe. gw gapernah g jadi org yg lame kok, tnang aja. personally, gw pikir imperfection ada biar lo jd org yg g cpet puas. that, i congrat u. but about failing... gw nemuin bahwa things would gw from bad to worse then better to best. itulah knp gw g takut gagal. takut c, tp g bgt". ah, tokh ntar klo gw gagal pasti ada bayarannya, gw pikir gto. failing is a compensation for success.

M : Lame drmnnya? klo lo lame ngapain gw ngeladenin lo! to be honest, I hate lame or boring ppl, lmao. lagipula, klo kita smua perfect, bkl boring kan? imperfection itu diciptain biar kita bisa slg melengkapi. thanks, that opened my perspective! besides, nobody can fly at first try. trial and error, trial and error.

G : Ay-yups. gila Moore, udh jam sgni?! ah, gra" lo n twilight, gw jd lupa waktu. gw tdr dlu ya. bsk smsan lgy. read u l8r sis. haha. hv a gr8 nite.

M : Emgnya knp? msh pagi kok buat gw, lmao. ya udh, ga semua org makhluk malem, gw ngerti kok. thanks, so long and goodnite! sleep tight and may tomorrow be better.